'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize