just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Randomize