No stitches, just platelets and will power
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
