It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I intend to get homeless drunk
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
