Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Less talking, more tequila
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
