I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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