Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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