dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i barfeds in our rink
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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