I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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