I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
grandma shit on top of the toilet
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I believe in your delicious
I think I just shit out all my problems.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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