This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
