Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
