Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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