She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
