Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
