he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
