i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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