Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Randomize
