Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
