how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Randomize
