her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
