I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
