Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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