i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Congratulations! We have a period
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
