I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
