I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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