How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
