with your own penis?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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