let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
