bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize