marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
