Duck Duck Cougar?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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