they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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