AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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