she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
