so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
