i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
