I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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