Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
