I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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