dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Do vagina's smell?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize