i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
