ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize