When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
