ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize