I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I have already put on my inside pants.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize