I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just saw a hot homeless man
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
