I'll bet she douches with gravy.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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