Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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