Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Randomize
