...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
